Posted by: drmilburn | October 26, 2011

Communication Skills

Communication

Communication is important in managing relationships and managing anger. Consider your communication with another person like a 5 car train. The engine represents the problem being addressed. The first car is one person expressing his/her feelings, thoughts, perceptions, wishes. The second car is the other person reflecting/repeating only what the first car contained. Until the first person says the understanding is correct, the communication stays here. Once there is agreement in understanding, the third car represents the second person expressing his/her feelings, thoughts, perceptions, wishes. The fourth car is the first person reflecting/repeating only what was heard in the third car. Once there is agreement and both persons understand each other, then the caboose is the finalization of how they agree to handle the problem. This is Active Listening Skills at it’s basic level.

Here are some tools to use when communicating:

TAKE TURNS

GIVE INFORMATION AND COMMNICATE WITH “I” STATEMENTS

LISTEN TO INFORMATION GIVEN IN RETURN

FIND A COMMON GROUND TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM

FOCUS ON THE PRESENT AND THE FUTURE WITHOUT REFERENCE TO PAST EVENTS

TAKE BREAKS WHEN GETTING TOO UPSET AND PROMISE TO RETURN TO THE CONVERSATION AT A SET TIME IN THE FUTURE

APOLOGIZE IF YOU GET UPSET AND VIOLATE THE RULES AND TRY TO BACK-UP

AVOID NAME-CALLING

AVOID BEING JUDGMENTAL

AVOID MAKING FACES, ROLLING EYES, LAUGHING AT THE OTHER PERSON

Posted by: drmilburn | September 12, 2011

Stress

Stress | Dr. Donna MilburnStress is one of the factors that can create feelings of frustration, anger, irritation, and contribute to a loss of anger control.  Are you feeling stressed?  Recognizing the symptoms and being aware of these as signs of stress is important.  Tell your doctor or your counselor if you are having some of these behaviors or problems.

__inability to sleep or lack of sleep

__letting little things bother you

__crying

__feeling out of control

__trouble concentrating

__yelling or raising your voice

__higher levels of irritability

__depressed mood

__feeling overwhelmed

__arguing with family, friends, co-workers

__changes in appetite

__overly negative or pessimistic attitude

__desire to drink alcohol, smoke, use drugs

__blaming others for mistakes

__flushed skin, redness in complexion, increased sweating

__headaches

__muscle spasms or twitching of muscles

__losing temper more often

__being unable to express feelings

__being disappointed frequently

__bowel changes

__feeling that life has treated you unfairly

As a reminder, tell your doctor or your counselor if you are experiencing some of these behaviors or problems.

Posted by: drmilburn | August 24, 2011

Chicken Scratch

Chicken Scratch - Dr. MilburnChicken Scratch - Dr. MilburnI just love chickens.  I never thought that I would like them because I was raised with the feeling that birds have diseases and mites and shouldn’t be touched.  When I bought my chickens as babies, they were so cute.  Everyone told me not to name them because they die easily, but I didn’t care.  I named them all.  I pet them and talk to them.  Now they are laying eggs every day and I have fresh eggs that are healthy an good for my family.  The flavor is better than most of the ones I was buying at the store.  Yeah for my feathery friends.

Posted by: drmilburn | March 31, 2011

What is Cyber Bullying?

With advances in technology come advances in the way kids can pick on each other. It used to be that bullying was relegated to the school yard, but today kids can use the internet and cell phones to bully each other in a way that has been termed cyber bullying. This new type of bullying can be just as harmful as traditional bullying and even have criminal ramifications.

Cyber bullying is when a child or teenager is harassed, threatened, humiliated, or otherwise targeted for abuse using the internet, cell phone, or other digital communication device. Cyber bullying only refers to children harassing other children, if adults are involved in the harassment than it is not called cyber bullying. Cyber bullying should be taken seriously because it can be so damaging and even be illegal.

Read More…

Posted by: drmilburn | March 30, 2011

Newsvine Article: Can You Learn Golf From A Book?

I’ve got a new golf article up on Newsvine asking the age old quesiton, can you learn golf from a book?

Let me know what you think. are there secrets to be learned about golf just by reading a book?  Do products like Harvey Penick’s Little Red Book or The Keys to the Effortless Golf Swing actually help teach you golf?  It’s an interesting discussion and I’d love to hear what you think.  Please share your thoughts on any one of my social media platforms.  C’mon, don’t be shy…

http://rcm.amazon.com/e/cm?t=thadstam-20&o=1&p=8&l=as1&asins=0684859246&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&fc1=000000&IS2=1&lt1=_blank&m=amazon&lc1=0000FF&bc1=000000&bg1=FFFFFF&f=ifrhttp://rcm.amazon.com/e/cm?t=thadstam-20&o=1&p=8&l=as1&asins=0689116306&ref=qf_sp_asin_til&fc1=000000&IS2=1&lt1=_blank&m=amazon&lc1=0000FF&bc1=000000&bg1=FFFFFF&f=ifr

Posted by: drmilburn | March 29, 2011

Best Exercise Tips for Golfers

If you are starting to play golf after leading a primarily sedentary lifestyle then you are going to notice that it is going to be rather difficult for you to just run out and play and entire 18 hole round of golf. However, if you have been playing for a while you are probably in much better physical shape, but overall your golf game will be greatly determined by your level of physical fitness. If you are in great shape physically, in terms of flexibility, strength and endurance you will be able to play a much better game than someone who is in lesser physical shape.

Dr. Donna Milburn Golf Exercises Plano

You are going to need to improve flexibility at the same time that you work to improve strength in order to have the best overall physical condition possible in order to play.  This means that you want to work to build lean muscle, rather than bulky muscles.  The primary differences is the amount of flexibility that the muscles provide.  Bulky muscles tend to be stronger, yet at the same time they are not as flexible which will greatly restrict your ability to twist appropriately while you are swinging the ball.  However, building lean muscle is not impossible, but will take a conscious effort.

The majority of people who are working to build muscle strength tend to build muscle mass automatically.  This is typically because they are lifting large amounts of weights.  Rather to build lean muscles you need to work to build repetitions of lower weight weights.  This will allow you to improve your muscle strength, while allowing you to work towards building the lean and slender muscles that are better for your overall golf game.  Resist the urge to lift weights that are heavier than 10 pounds because this will result in bulky muscles rather than lean muscles.
Read More…

Posted by: drmilburn | January 26, 2011

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F52MW7ZQ9DS4 for Technorati

Posted by: drmilburn | January 11, 2011

Dogs

Dogs. Man’s best friends.

Rescued DogThese amazing creatures have the ability to bring human beings many positive impacts on their lives. Research has shown that the average dog and his or her presence in a person’s life can decrease blood pressure readings, improve mood states, improve coping responses to stress, and provides motivation for accomplishing many tasks. Nursing home residents live longer and happier lives when dogs are available to them. But putting the psychological view aside, dogs themselves are just great! Last week someone dumped a beautiful dog in my neighborhood. The dumping of large dogs has become a serious problem today.

The economy is bad and I understand that some people have trouble paying their bills and feeding their families so they then believe they cannot feed their large dogs. GIVE ME A BREAK!!! If you can’t feed your dog, care for the animal you decided to house or take care of your own pet, then GO TO A SHELTER, GIVE THE DOG TO A NO-KILL ORGANIZATION, POST THE DOG FOR ADOPTION. Do not throw that dog away on the streets! A dog is at grave risk for being killed by a car, attacked and killed by other dogs, shot by small ranch owners, or starving to death without its owner.

Rescued DogThis beautiful creature came to my door on New Year’s Eve. I couldn’t leave it to suffer such a fate. My own three dogs were not pleased to have a large, half-dog half-wolf breed in their mist. I had to keep him in the garage and work diligently to give him opportunities to go to the backyard while trying to calm the other dogs in the house when he was out. Socks, his new name because of his white front paws, would rise onto his back feet and stand taller than my head. He was gentle and kind, though clearly able to take out the other dogs and my cat with a quick snap of his jaws. He did not bark but would howl as a wolf when he needed to go out for bathroom time. He did not bite and obeyed commands such as sit, shake, give me a kiss. He looked and behaved beautifully. I would have kept Socks except that the other family members could not adapt to him. After three nights of lost sleep (my dogs whined and barked all night because a wolf was in the garage), I found a no-kill shelter and gave them a financial donation to help them take Socks and find him a home. On Monday, I cried as I dropped the baby off to the wonderful shelter workers. I sobbed harder when I looked around and saw – not a couple, not twenty, but over a hundred dogs abandoned by their owners at the shelter. This dog farm, this haven of safety for unwanted animals, housed pen after pen of the most amazing creatures! Full-blood Irish setters, huskies, and a variety of blended breed dogs were seen across the acres of pens.

How can other people be so self-centered and selfish that they would abandon a dog on the streets?! Put tags on your pets. Put leashes on your pets. Put chips in your pets. Put fences up if you have dogs. Vaccinate your pets. Register your pets with the city. Be responsible in your ownership of dogs. If you don’t want to, THEN DON’T OWN A DOG!

Posted by: drmilburn | November 19, 2010

Latest Post at Newsvine!

Check out my new post on Newsvine about Divorce:

http://drmilburn.newsvine.com/_news/2010/11/19/5496585-divorce

Divorce is a difficult decision for an individual and has a lasting impact on the children.  Sometimes people have no other option than to leave a marriage and move on in life.  Most religions discourage the decision to divorce and require certain problems to be present before the divorce is sanctioned by the church.  The Catholic Church has a list of requirements and an evaluation to be performed before they will approve a divorce or grant an annulment of a marriage, thus allowing the individual to later be remarried in the church.  Steps can be taken to minimize the negative impact on children if a divorce becomes impossible to avoid.  Making the divorce as conflict-free as possible is important.  Engaging in co-parenting classes and learning how to communicate about the child or children is a must.   Research shows that people who are married live longer, healthier lives.  Children whose parents remain in their relationships with each other and with extended family members tend to remain in school longer and achieve higher levels of education, tend to marry others more successfully and have lower rates of divorce, and tend to have less utilization of psychological or psychiatric services.  Children whose parents get divorced tend to have lower levels of education, higher utilization of psychological or psychiatric services, and tend to have higher rates of divorce in their own marriages.  Before filing for divorce, an individual should consider going to a psychologist or licensed counselor who has experience working with divorced families and following their guidance in how to make the process the least disruptive and harmful to the children.

Posted by: drmilburn | November 5, 2010

Golf Heaven

Just posted an article on Newsvine titled “Golf Heaven.”  Check it out at http://bit.ly/d7NGVg.  A teaser of the article is below: 

A golf ball directly before the hole

Image via Wikipedia

Standing on the green fairway with a slight breeze rustling through the trees, the sound of a squirrel climbing up bark while you calculate the distance from your ball to the pin and what club must be used, taking into account the direction of the wind, the dryness of the ground, the angle of the slope to the pin, and your physical well-being this day all comes together in the next moments in time.  Club selection complete, a practice swing, addressing the ball, and then the repetitive thoughts in your head as you swing through the stroke.  A strike of the ball sends in flying through the air to land on the green surface and to roll as you watch toward the hole.  If magic is in the air, the ball disappears into the hole and is out of sight.  An adrenaline rush fuels your response and you know that this moment is absolute heaven.  Nothing greater at this second in time.

This moment in heaven is not disrupted by the stresses occurring in daily life, because the concentration necessary for that spectacular shot, that eagle or birdie that moved your score to a better place, that accomplishment that you know is more luck than skill much of the time, is also a moment of escape from the stress that you deal with in the world outside of the golf course

Read the rest of the post at http://bit.ly/d7NGVg.

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